Yesterday, Jess and I went to my friend Felicite's wedding. We were very excited as it was our first Rwandan wedding. Thankfully another friend and head teacher, Leandre, was there to act as interpreter for us which was really helpful as I'd been told that the first ceremony, the dowry giving, was very funny...but only if you understood Kinyarwanda.
During this ceremony, the man's family arrive and request that their boy is allowed to marry the girl of the hosting family. A dramatic debate follows where the girl's family put up lots of reasons why the boy cannot marry her (these are fictitious but present a humorous display for all the guests). Yesterday's reasons included "You came here before and wanted to marry another girl, she is still waiting for you" (the other girl was an elderly woman who stood up and waved at him!) and "our family member was stood by the roadside and you did not stop to give them assistance". Both times the boy's family responded well, much to the enjoyment of the wedding guests and eventually the girl was invited out of the house and presented to the groom. The groom's family gave a dowry of many gifts including money (to represent cows), alcohol, food and baskets to the bride's family and everyone celebrated.
After the 2 hour dowry-giving, where we were given food, drink and plenty of inhore dancing, we bundled back into our mini-buses and headed for the church. A Catholic service followed, which was very similar to the church weddings we have in England. Then we walked to a beautiful area near the church where the bride and groom served each other drinks, presents were given by the guests, more traditional dancing took place and we all shared some of the sponge cake.
It was a wonderful day and a great opportunity to get a snap-shot into the traditions of Rwandan marriage
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